What's Marriage nowadays anyway?

Sometime ago I found the man of my dreams. He is very affectionate, he writes love letters and sends texts, he's caring and considerate, he's a family man, deeply family oriented. Great father to my first daughter and to his twins. Considering all these things it was easy to make the plunge into the unknown of marriage.

I've had some great examples to follow, from my parents who recently celebrated their 25th anniversary to classmates from the Queen's School who are young and saved and doing the darn thing. My husband and I had vowed to always keep our feelings in the open, even at the risk of hurting each others feelings. And it's really worked for us so far. I came up with the idea through hearing many complaints from girlfriends about issues they were having in their various relationships. Yet I was the only person who was aware other than them. This didn't make much sense since I wasn't in the relationship with them. This made my advice giving role easier to manage, all I told them was, "so tell him." I've seen infidelity and break ups from this very same reason. If he never knows how you feel about something, how can he work toward fixing it?

Many women however confuse "letting him know" with "nagging him to death." This is more than a subtle difference. Telling him once and then mentioning it once more sometime into the future if you see no change is a far cry different from telling him two hours per day everyday. THAT'S nagging! Come on ladies, he heard you the first time. What happens after that is completely up to you. Do you stay and nag? Stay and wait it out patiently? Or do you leave because you finally realise, if he was for you, cared about you AND your feelings then he would work towards making and keeping you happy.

My husband and I have had our scrapes, there are gentle prods and all out monster truck shoves. Somehow we manage to come out on top. I think its as a result of our mutual goal, to be happy, to remain so till death do us part and to set a life altering example for our kids to take into their own marriages someday.

The divorce rate is staggering and mostly I believe we lose sight of why we wanted to get married in the first place. We give up too easily and we never set ground rules to begin with. There are some marriages that shouldn't have even begun in the first place, but, consider them well learnt lessons. I wish all newly weds and veterans more love, more peace and even more communication as we round out our time here on earth with our partners. All the best ya'll.